Before there was e-mail, before text messaging, before Face Time or Facebook or Face Masks or whatever, if you wanted to catch up with family and friends at this time of year, you would do so via Christmas cards. You’d go to that hard-to- reach drawer or shelf in your closet where you put things you knew you would only use once a year, and pull down that red box containing cards and envelopes……and……The List.
Yes. The List. It might be an address book. Might be a legal pad. Maybe just a ripped out sheet from a notebook. No matter how hard you tried to keep it organized, it was a mess of crossed out names and addresses, with updated names and addresses scribbled into the margins. It might well have coffee stains and sticky spots from where food and drink was spilled on it during long hours of writing and updating.
It was a pain keeping it current, and, of course, making those critical decisions about who stays on it and who goes. Did they send me a card last year? Exactly how many years should I send them a card without getting one in return before I take them off? What if I take them off, and they send me a late card after Christmas? Do I send one back? Wouldn’t that tip them off that I took them off my list?
Regardless, it was worth the stress, because sending them out usually meant you got several back in return. Each one would have a little hand-written summary of how things were with them and their family, maybe even a photo or two. It was your life line for staying connected. I looked forward to the mail arriving every day in December, anxiously anticipating another stack of news flashes from loved ones I seldom got to see.
Over time, much has changed. It seems fewer folks every year are motivated to put in the time to work through their list and write out the cards. So much easier, I guess, to bang out a group e-mail. I get it. Life is busy. Time is short. Still, I can’t help feeling something has been lost.
Those few minutes it took to write something personal to us in the card meant that, if only for a moment, that person thought about us and thought enough of us to want to share their own highlights, if only briefly.
Sharon and I still get several cards, and I’m still excited to open them and see who they’re from. Very few have any kind of personal message hand written in them. This makes me sad because I really want to know more about what’s going on with them. But I’m thankful nonetheless to still be on their list, and I console myself by keeping in mind that maybe they did have to think about us for a moment as they addressed the card.
At this point, I must engage in full disclosure. I have easy talking. Sharon takes on the task of writing out and sending our cards. Sometimes we consult together about…..The List…..but she does all the work. I just reap the benefits of reading the cards that come in. So I don’t mean for this blog to come off as being critical. As I said, I get it. I appreciate the time it takes to commit to the task.
I just hope it’s a tradition that does not fade away, as so many do because technology allows it.
We still sent out cards each year but seldom write anything personal. I addressed the envelopes last night. You have inspired me to add a personal note, at least to the out of town people that I don’t see regularly.
Thanks
Ken, I agree with you. Life is about relationships and in this hurried world we forget that. Thank you for your thoughts in your blogs.
PS your brother Bob and I have been friends for decades. I once saw you on the morning show as I was passing through your nice city. Merry Christmas
What a wonderful blog Ken! I’ve been sending cards for years and always include a letter letting everyone know how we’re doing. My letter is quite light hearted and funny rather than extolling virtues. I too, look forward to receiving cards! I keep them all and look back on them throughout the year! Hope you and Sharon have a very Merry Christmas!! I always enjoy your blogs!!!
I keep the list, address, and sign the inside of the card. My husband seals, stamps, and stamps the return address on the envelops. Therefore, it is a joint effort at our house.
Loved reading this. I always write something personal if I send a card. I haven’t done so this year. But you have inspired me. Maybe I’ll do it just that tomorrow.
Sorry I didn’t send a note in my card! Next year!!
Ken, so happy we haven’t been deleted from your list! Our stack is very small this year but honored that among them is the one from you and Sharon!
I do feel guilty for no longer sending out cards with newsletters for those far away! We, too, get excited about receiving them and love the ones with pictures so much that they hang on our refrigerator until they are replaced next year!
Thus wish is not in the form of a card but from our hearts when we wish you and all your wonderful family the merriest of Christmases and a safer 2021!!!
Love this post and so true. Each year I receive fewer and fewer.
Our Christmas Card to you and Sharon are a long standing tradition. Love writing a little not and enjoy receiving a personal message from you guys. Happy New Year to you!