Month: September 2025

As I have progressed into my senior years, I have had so many friends and acquaintances who have lost their spouses. And I have noticed a definite pattern. Women who are widowed tend to join together and support each other. They travel together and socialize together and do their best to fill the gaps left from the loss of their husbands. They often live for many more years.

Men, however, don’t seem to do this. They either try to go it alone, or try to remarry as quickly as possible. Maybe we are just not as good at rebuilding life. Maybe we are too macho to show vulnerability. As a result, many men don’t last long after the death of their spouse.

There’s no shame in admitting that you are lonely and depressed. Don’t let yourself get disconnected and isolated. Your friends still love you, and still want you to be part of their fellowship. We men should take a lesson from the women.

Some people are social animals, while others are loners. Some folks crave the constant company of people. They thrive on interaction with others, and they are lost and miserable if there is nobody “to play with”. Then there are folks who sort of “tolerate” being around others, but are secretly most comfortable when they are alone with their own thoughts and desires.

A healthy life usually strikes a balance between the two. There are certainly times when we want and need to share our talents and enjoy fellowship with other people. Gives us perspective and the opportunity to serve, which is good for the soul. But we also need to spend quiet time, to relax and perhaps talk things over with God, listening for His reply.

It’s easy to become too busy or too lonely. Extremes usually don’t work.